This really sucks

So much happened this week at work and at home it is crazy how fast the weeks go by now that most of my day is spent at work.
I really don't like working at all I feel like I work all day and never see my kids and then when payday is here and it should be the BIG pay off...it is for next to nothing... With mike and I both working we are still struggling to pay the bills. This makes me so depressed because Christmas is coming and we have NOTHING at all to buy Christmas with. I don't know what to do. I feel like getting a second job but then I would really never see the kids. This is so AWFUL!!! Mike and I work so hard and for what to struggle to make ends meet. Mike is worried about getting laid off and I hate my job. I think I just hate the idea of working in general because I feel like I am neglecting my kids. Savannah and Seth both have field trips that they want me to go on BUT NO I can't I have to work.....I don't think i would mind if I didn't have to work every day. If I just worked like 12 hour shifts and then could spend some time with the kids when I was off.- But then what would I do with Sloan all day everyday...He would not have Crossroads to go to.
I really just want to scream......I feel like there is no way out for us if I don't work we r screwed and if I do work then we or I are screwed.....